Life After Divorce . . . It WILL Happen

By Lindy Earl

Divorce is tough. No question.  It’s hard on the family.  It’s hard on our friends, as they support and encourage us.  It’s painfully hard to watch what it does to our children.  Divorce is tough on us.

Divorce brings out a plethora of negatives – there is often very little money after a divorce.  How are we going to pay all the bills?  Some things, important things like dental work, just have to be let go.  Maybe next year . . . . You find yourself handling all the chores, inside and out.  Some of the chores you didn’t even know existed!  I had no idea that garage door bolts have to be tightened! One more chore for the never-ending list.

And every decision rests on your shoulders, alone.  From the time you wake to the time you fall exhausted into bed again, there are dozens of questions and decisions that come at you.  You may be able to defer some for a day or two, but they all need answers – Did you get the stuff you need for the project? Mom, can I spend the night with my best friend? Did the repair work or is it leaking again? Will traffic make you late? Did you finish the report for your boss? Is there milk in the house? 

SO MANY QUESTIONS – and only you to answer them.

Divorce is tough.

But, one day, it will happen, and you’ll find someone who wants to spend time with you.  Someone who finds you fascinating and funny. Someone who thinks you’re attractive even when you think you’re a mess – sometimes especially when you think you’re a mess.

One time, as I was power washing my driveway, my neighbor stopped to chat.  I was filthy, absolutely covered in water and grime.  He asked me how I was.  I looked down at myself and asked, “How do I look?”  He gave me a quick once-over and said, “Tremendous.”  Oh, was I jealous of his wife for that brief instant.  It wasn’t a come on, but it was encouraging.  I told his wife the story a few days later and she nodded and said, “Yep, he’s an encourager all right.” 

One day, somebody will see you just like that.

One day you will have somebody to cuddle with on a Friday night.  Whether you are at a local sporting event or watching a rerun on Netflix, there will be someone next to you, with their hand in yours.  Snuggling in just to get a little closer.

It WILL happen that you will walk into the kitchen and find the dishes done.  Miraculous?  No.  It WILL happen.

Divorce is tough, but the pain doesn’t have to last forever.  Open yourself to new possibilities.  Put the thought into the universe that someday, it WILL happen.

You will find your significant other.  You will find your other half.  You will find someone who will listen while you make tough decisions.  Someone who will support you.  Someone who will put your needs first.

And you will do the same for them, because your someone is out there right now, and they know that you’re out there, and they know that it WILL happen for them, too.

That’s Life After Divorce.

            Lindy is a Speaker, Columnist, Author, and Consultant.  Contact her at or find her on Face Book and join the group,  Single Again: From Devastation to Dating, on FB.