By Kenneth Stepp
My heart will always be lost. It will be lost in a moment. The moment after I rang your doorbell. Your glass door was closed but your front door was open. I’m lost watching you walk towards the door. You were wearing white sandals, white long tight pants, and a navy and white blouse. I loved that look. I’m lost in that moment.
My heart will always be lost in other moments too. The moment you asked me to just stay at your house because we lived so far apart. My whole self smiled. The moment when I took the guest room instead of your room to sleep. When you asked why, I told you if we did that it might be all we’d ever be. And I hoped we’d be a lot. You smiled. I’m lost in that moment.
My heart will always be lost. The slow dances in our home, making you breakfast, lunch and dinner. I loved the songs you chose to slow dance to. I play them when I’m alone now and I go back to a time when my life made sense. I’m lost in those moments too. Those moments are treasures to me. I still stare at your picture. Especially the one where you were in your spot. You loved your spot. I’m lost in that moment.
My heart will always be lost. As we stood looking over the valley at Pine Mountain on the day we met. How do two strangers meet for 8 hours. I’ll be lost in every moment we shared that day. Our first kiss was under that tree. That was a moment I want to be lost in. Our conversation that day seemed to never have voids. We emptied our hearts and filled them back up that day. I’m lost in that moment.
In a few days the anniversary of your leaving will be here. I won’t be celebrating that day. I will be alone but with you again. Instead we will celebrate the moments that we were allowed to have. The laughter, the tears, the breaking down and building up, and the romance we shared. Open hearts heal one another. Our walls fell with a quiet thud and we were free. We promised each other our love was forever and I know now that it will be.
Thank you for the moments. We will laugh and dance again one day in a place where everything is known and love prevails.
