Single Again… Some Say Love

By Kenneth Stepp

 

Some say love it is a river

That drowns the tender reed

Some say love it is a razor

That leaves your soul to bleed”The Rose

 

There are times when words capture me. These words have. Only love can evoke the visual for me of causing my soul to bleed. First, science, in most circles, say there is no such thing as a soul. Those scientists have never lost someone they loved more than life itself. I am a studious man, a knowledge junkie, a lover of books. I work from my laptop and most days will pull up a lecture or long interview from someone much smarter than I. I enjoy learning about new things I’d never considered. One day, while studying another subject, the professor mentioned the near death experience. I looked into the case he referenced and BANG! I was hooked. Consciousness… Our very soul. It fascinated me.

 

“Some say love it is a hunger

An endless aching need

I say love it is a flower

And you it’s only seed” – The Rose

 

I have loved. I have loved to a capacity I did not know existed. I also lost this love. My soul bled and there are days when it still does. A reminder to never allow anyone to become that “only seed” again. Who am I kidding? I keep thinking my heart lives and beats behind high thick walls, then someone calls me crying, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger. My heart or soul quickly moves and lets me know I have no walls. There are times I wish cynicism would kick in and I could be suspicious of women who just kind of show up or pay attention to me. Lord knows I have met plenty of them who are behind massive walls. Most have no idea they are. I have learned to try and be their friend only. Friend zoning doesn’t always convince them I’m not here to cause damage. But it’s all I have.

 

“It’s the heart afraid of breaking

That never learns to dance

It’s the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance

It’s the one who won’t be taken

Who cannot seem to give

And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live” – The Rose

 

We fear having our heart broken because we’ve had it broken before. We’ve dreamed of a life with someone, this is why we are afraid to wake when we find ourself in another dream. Myself, I’ve loved someone who could not return love. How much pain made her that way? I would have spent the rest of my life convincing her how important she was to me. Maybe then she could have loved again. Can my soul bleed so much that it dies? Since I speak in metaphors, why not? Today, I am in Shelbyville Kentucky on the family farm. My mom is still asleep and the house is quiet. She taught me what unconditional love is. I am forever grateful to her for that. I’ll be headed back home today, driving, thinking, and listening to music that makes my soul bleed again. I think there are those of us who feel more deep, hear beyond their words, and like me, have thoughts that others would never understand. Or maybe I’m simply delusional. Maybe…

 

When the night has been too lonely

And the road has been too long

And you think that love is only

For the lucky and the strong

Just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snows

Lies the seed

That with the sun’s love

In the spring

Becomes the rose” – The Rose

 

I know those lonely nights well. Days too. I love this song because it speaks of love growing from a seed. Mine has grown into something akin to a beanstalk that a giant would be confident in climbing. I’ll enjoy my 450 mile drive home. When I return I will be working on taking an as to what could have been and finding that seed again. I will pray the environment will be one that this beautiful seed will grow into What God has for me. Wish me luck…

 

Here is a link to this beautiful song. Read the words as she sings it, allow it to bathe your heart with what it needs. Feel again. And if you are ever lucky enough to have someone love you, let them.

The Rose

6 Comments

  1. I read your heartfelt words and listened to The Rose. It all comes together perfectly….will we find that ONE I hope so ♥️

  2. Simply beautiful. You may not realize how many women would give anything to have a man who freely expresses their deepest feelings and thoughts! You are very special and deserve a lady who cannot and will appreciate and guard you.

  3. This is probably my favorite of all you have written.
    It brings me to tears.
    The words of the song and the words you have written
    To me the hardest love to lose,
    Is the one you tried the hardest to keep!

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