Single Again… Love Can

By Kenneth Stepp


Have you ever wondered why people in love are happier than those who aren’t? What you can’t see is their journey to find love. Real forever fairy tale love can be elusive. Then when it comes it can be awkward. Two people seldom reach love at the same moment. One knows and the other is interested enough to stay, or that’s the hope. When love does come, what would you do? Some accept love when it comes, some find the person they are suppose to be with and stay with them as the relationship unfolds. Then there are those who sabotage the relationship. I wish I understood them better. Is it fear, or something else? Like I said. I wish I understood this one. Maybe deep down we do not think we deserve real love. If you have gone from abusive relationships to abusive relationships. Perhaps when the real thing shows up, it becomes something we fear or do not feel worthy of.


“We accept the love we think we deserve.”

― Stephen Chbosky


It’s funny. For me, when I became single again, my idea of finding love was about the same as when I found it before. You know, back in the day. Twenty four years earlier. Man was I in for an awakening. Times have changed. I can’t write the changes into this, far too many than would fit here. In some ways it seems that the male female roles have switched. I have found far more aggressive girls at this age than back then. And the mass confusion is almost blinding. Here are two mature people in a relationship of some kind, but in reality they have no idea where they stand with one another.Watching it is like watching a plane falling from the sky. You know how it will end, so you don’t want to watch. But you just can’t help yourself.


This is not love, it might not even be like. When real love comes, I hope I’m ready for it. Heck. I just hope it comes one day. And when it does, or if, that I have prepared my heart enough to recognize it and embrace it. What a tragedy it would be to finally find love and not be ready. Some find the whole thing so confusing they don’t want to be involved in the journey at all. I get that. Treading water in an unknown ocean is confusing, scary, and dangerous. There are some real carnivorous in these waters. The value of finding one’s soulmate is in the balance. Something so elusive yet almost everyone thinks they will find it. If hope makes that happen, we will all find our match soon.


Why do we want love? It can be so messy, and it can be so difficult. But when you lay awake in your bed at night, alone, maybe a little beat up from the long day, and you are wondering what can repair the damage that failures and mistakes have done to your life. The answer is simple. Love can. It’s why we stay on the journey. Because love can…. It really can…


“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

 Dr. Seuss