Single Again… Dealing With Betrayal

By Kenneth Stepp

Being disloyal, being unfaithful, lying, two-faced, etc. These are all forms of betrayal. I have had so many friends along my singles journey tell me their stories about this problem. I listened, I honestly cared, but I really couldn’t relate to how that must feel. Well, until now…

Being single has its challenges, especially in today’s climate of, “me first”, attitudes. Most, really have found a sort of normalcy in being all about themselves. Most, in my opinion, would deny being this way, but after so many failed tries at finding love, being lied to, and having self absorbed people using them for one reason or another, they become their own little island, always on guard, always keeping what might hurt them again at bay. Of course, they can’t know what else they are keeping away from them.

The betrayal I’m dealing with today was in my past. A person that I dated over a year ago that I fell pretty hard for was unfaithful. Most would look at this and say, what’s the big deal. First, this is my first time dealing with an unfaithful mate, this was the first time I was certain about who I was to someone, and this was the first time I was sure that someone was sent from God to be my soulmate, I somehow convinced myself of this. I know, those are huge firsts.

As a business owner who has spent his life working for myself, I have been betrayed many times. I dealt in large numbers in the past, when dealing in millions of dollars, there will always be people hanging around trying to take what you have, many times, they will act like friends, many times, they are adept at gaining your confidence. They have to be if they are to be successful at their chosen profession of being a thief. In matters of the heart, it works differently.

I want to believe in my fellow humans, I want to believe the very best is what they desire to bring to the table. I want to believe we are all looking for forever and we will pursue forever with integrity in an honest and passionate way. But that isn’t the way the singles journey works, or at least not for everyone. Some believe shortcuts, hidden agendas, and deceit are the right tools to get them there. I won’t judge another person for these things, but do hope I can stay out of their destructive paths. I think all of us who are sincerely searching for forever are this way.

Ok, enough about negative things about being single. Yesterday, because i work for myself and I am single, I took a road trip to the mountains in the northern part of my beautiful state. If I were married and stacked BBs for some cold uncaring company, I’d never be able to go on adventures like that. So, being single does offer a measure of freedom. Of course I was alone on my adventure, so there is what could be seen as a negative. It was for me.

Today, my day will be busy. I woke early so that I could enjoy the quiet of my home, sitting alone in my den, working, thinking, and even planning. I have to be somewhere at 8:30 for business. But after that, I may have yet another adventure, one where I may be around others, one where I’ll make new friends. Friends are where I believe my soulmate is hiding. Whether an old friend or one I haven’t met yet, is entirely up in the air. All I know is my soulmate exists, she will be amazing, and we will know by our chemistry if we are a we.

Do you believe in soulmates? Do you still believe in love at all? I hear from a few who they have given up. Please don’t allow someone’s past bad behavior to take from your future, don’t allow a person without vision to steal yours, and don’t allow someone who wasn’t meant for you to keep you from the one that was. God has a way of repairing us. Let Him…