Ask Lindy . . . Is Texting Rude?

By Lindy Earl

Dear Lindy,

I am interested in a person who doesn’t know I’m alive.  I see them all the time and have developed a crush on them even though we have never met.  You can imagine all the conversations I have had in my mind with this person. What do I do?


Dear Lonely,

​     There is no reason to be lonely.  While you believe that this person doesn’t know you’re alive, it is very possible that they are as aware of you as you are of them.  Maybe they’ve imagined conversations with you as well.

Life is too short to not take a chance, especially where your heart is concerned.  Arm yourself with some good conversation starters and confidence and approach this person at your first opportunity.

Either way, you will have your answer.


Dear Lindy,

Do you have advice on texting?

After our first date, a guy and I started texting. He would text me and I would reply, then he would wait 3-4 hours to reply. After a week I asked him to stop texting me if he didn’t have time to reply when I replied.

He got offended that I said something about this texting habits. He was out of work so I’m sure he had time to reply since he initiated the text.

Thank you, HML.

Dear HML,

I’m sorry this happened to you.  I think your response is acceptable if it works for you.

I find one of the joys of texting is that texts do not require immediate attention.  Still, it seems odd that he would begin a conversation then leave it sitting there for a while.

Manners are required in all forms of communication, including texting.  The challenge is that no written rules are written for texting, like they are for table manners.  You need to know what is important to you.

For instance, I have a colleague who cannot tolerate cell phones at the table.  When we are at the same table I know his feelings and keep my phone out of sight, out of respect and kindness to this person.  It is not a hard and fast rule, but his preferences.

Since you know that you desire a quicker response, please communicate that to your dates so they know how you feel. Then if they consistently disregard your feelings you have rudeness, and that is never acceptable.


Dear Lindy,

A woman I met on-line texted me the morning of our first date and told me her car had broken down out of town.  She didn’t want to miss our date so asked me to send her the money to fix her car so we could meet as planned.  What should I do?

Dear Wondering,

RUN! This is a scammer.  Block her and don’t look back.

Lindy is a Relationship Speaker, Consultant, and Advisor.  If you have a question, or would like to speak with Lindy about other matters, please contact her at